Monday, January 12, 2009

Confusing Poems about bad event, and one about some good guys

There is nothing that annoys me more than doom and gloom theories. The more vague the doom the more pissed I get. The peak of this upset comes from a French mystic by the name of Nostradamus. I’ve read up on this fellow and found that he must be one of the most depressed fellows that ever lived. All he does is talk and how in the future the world will be such a terrible place because a few good men will die, some towers will burn, and world wars will happen. While those are terrible things, his worlds were always interpreted after the event.

Nostradamus wrote some vague poems about how Hitler and Napoleon would attack Europe and Kennedy would get capped, but nobody figured it out until it was too late. Of course we all know that Kennedy died, Hitler happened, and Napoleon is an awesome three-flavored ice cream flavor that can please the whole family. But I want to hear some good news. Why couldn’t Nostradamus talk about a few good things? Pepper them in there to lift the spirits of future generations.

Even if a prophecy has to be about something seemingly depressing can’t we just have one prophecy that talks about love and peace? I love peace, and I hate war. War does nothing but give people one more delusion to worry about, one more human being to demonize, and one more separation between an American’s life and life of a man in the Middle East taking shelter from the bombs of people that look just like him. His culture may be different, but he isn’t trying to hurt a soul. He is only caught in the crossfire.

And if Nostradamus was such a prophet, why did he let others write additions to his prophecies? Some much was added on after his death, that I won’t accept that he had any real power other than a really negative world view. So I will add on to his vague poems with one happy story, just so that the world isn’t so gloomy to all that have heard that non-sense.

A working class hero will tell us of love.
A Ssar will play to the beat of his own drum.
A heartthrob will reject the angry glove.
And the quiet man will teach many how to hummmmm.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Collective Conscious.

While we have a few awful scenerios schedualed for the end times, one must realized that to every action, the is an equal and opposing opposite reaction. In the case of 20112 I turn to the works of New Age dreamers and prophets from here to the center of the Milky Way galaxy. While many people worry about Y2k+12, these folks bask in the brilliance of an awaking of the collective conscious. This takes the form of a mental envelope surrounding the world, which will allow us to realize that we are all, in fact, one.

If you are not thinking on this level, picture a world in which you no longer need you cell phone to call your mom, best friend, stranger halfway across the room, aboriginal guardian, or guru from the Vedic period. Essentially making your imagination the only limit. Now while this may seem like the user of this envelope is someone with an overactive imagination, it’s not. Because no matter how far out the user of this mental envelope is, they will ALWAYS be able to find somebody even more “out there”; even if it is all in their head.

Now the price of such a service is NOT free. The charge is that intended user kills their ego through extensive meditation, non-judgment, loving thy neighbor as the self, communing with nature, enduring the judgmental eye of the world, confronting their inner deamons, loosing almost every belief formerly help to be true, and eventually finding the good in everything an every one. Essentially becoming a different person, a person that has left ordinary reality to be a genuinely happy person. It seems like a difficult list to digest, but just about everything new agey is. If you are a person that understands the world through visual means, I offer you this…

…Picture your ego as a ball of goo. This ball of amazing elastic plastic can be inflated to any size imaginable. The bigger the ego balloon, the more a person can write the beliefs on it. In ordinary reality, this balloon is usually fairly large, and almost always very decorative. But, due to the size of such a balloon, it will never fit in the envelope. Primarily because, Ego/Balloons have too much fun showing its decorations to other gigantic balloons. Of course all this does, is create ego/balloon competitions, making other balloons win or loose.

The popping of this giant balloon will allow it to either reinflate even larger, or find its way into the mysterious envelope. Within this tiny envelope anything imaginable can happen as all of the tiny little goo balls smile at each other in the darkness. While this is a fun place to be for the formless goo ball, the ball may still required to wander about with about the giant balloons outside the envelope. Communication can become much more difficult without the same having the same size, a little gooball may not feel to confident about no having a giant ego/balloon. But eventually the little goo balls can find themselves to be very versatile when they rediscover their own ability to inflate and deflate. Because the little envelope will always be there to go back to…

Thursday, December 11, 2008

The Anti-Christ




The Anti-Christ; it is a word we use to describe our in-laws, our children, our neighbors, and our bosses. But I have been informed by the highest authority, YouTube, that we have just elected the REAL Anti-Christ. Yes, Barack Hussein Obama is the anti-Christ because he is a Muslim, charismatic speaker, bringer of change and hope, and he carries an Indian good luck charm. Not the grade A, feathers and tomahawk, American Indians; no, he has an answers your tech support calls Indian good luck charm. As far as our novelty levels go, we may have hit the jackpot. And, the currency it yields, an electronic chip with the number 666 implanted in your hand.
Hey, I know its sounds far fetched, but I heard it on YouTube. YouTube isn’t run by that sinister illuminato that runs MSNBC, CNN, ABC, and even those Queen worshipping limeys at the BBC. This info is coming from mavericks all over the interwebs. And in four years, to the month, you will all see this little blue dot be destroyed by this serpent in black sheep’s clothing.
Now how this happens is controversial. But if we turn to Nostradamus’ previously identified Anti-Christ, Adolf Hitler, we may be able to see the big picture. First off, these men both united people. While Hitler reminded folks about how evil Commies and Jews were, Barack Hussein Obama step farther and blurs our ability to see each other’s differences. That’s even worse my friends. Do you know who else did that? Jim Jones did. And he murdered all of his followers, just like Barack Hussein Obama will do to American. All I know is that I’m not drinking Kool-Aid for the next four years.
And as for the New World Order, Hitler gave Barack Hussein Obama a pretty decent strategy. First, you diplomicize your neighbors into joining your empire. Canada and Mexico are just the beginning friends. The Entire EU will be Barack Hussein Obama’s Pawn as he prepares to blitzkrieg China and Russia. But those pinko commies grow a pair before the first electric tanks can approach Leningrad, and nuke us all the way to Armageddon.
Now, I know what you’re thinking. This can’t be true. But it makes a hell of a lot more sense than space invaders. Of course, YouTube may be wrong. They were when they said the election would be cancelled. What if he is the second coming? I mean, he did absolve America from four hundred years of the struggle by showing us that we will overcome. And I really wouldn’t mind a president that was down with other religions. And he did a lot of community service maybe that is the loving of thy neighbor that I’ve heard so much. Though, it would be pretty novel if he was the really was the Anti-Christ, and the second coming, the Luke Skywalker to his Darth Vader, was just some little girl.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

To Novel (Not) to Mention



Ok, after searching YouTube for the past several months. Their are a few things that annoyed me so much that I had to talk about them.

Niriburu - I really can't stand this one at all. So I figured it had to be worth mention. For all that have not heard of Niriburu, or Planet X, it is a red smudge that can be seen outside of out solar system. And many believe that this Red Smudge will crash into our little blue dot sometime around 2012. The belief that this red smudge is in fact a planet comes from a Sumerian picture with 10 planets revolving around the sun. While destruction of earth in the form of a red ball is novel, it isn’t novel enough for the show that we call history to jump the shark. It’s a rather abrupt and leaves no room for a less than interesting sequel.

Annunaki Invasion – Riding off the coat tails of Niriburu I turn my thoughts to the people that I am told live on that red smudge. Now, I am informed be the good folks over at Youtube that Niriburu may only enter earth’s region in the solar system. And the Giants, Man-Sized Lizards, Grey dudes from Roswell, and Egytpo-looking vultures will pour out of this gigantic red smudge to enslave human kind in one massive wave. What humans could be used for is beyond me though. If our manual labor being is taken over by robots, vending machines, and roombas, I don’t see how we would be much use to aliens. The only novel thing I see coming from this event is world peace. Because finally, all over the planet we would realize how similar we were when compared to an invasion force comprised of those things from mars attacks.

Novelty

Before I can allow myself to tackle the Mayan Calendar, Book of Revelations, Nostradamus, Hopi Prophecies, Jose Arguelles, World War III, Nuclear Apocalypse, a New World Order, Planet X, The Annunaki Reptilians, The Collective Subconscious, the Age of Aquarius, or The Second Coming of John Lennon, I have to ground myself enough to realize that not everything on that list is based on reality. But they all have one thing in common, they are novelty.

Although novelty is a concept originally produced by Terrence McKenna when he explained Timewave Zero, it may be the most objectively grounded way on can investigate, “The End of the World,” without stocking up on duck tape and canned meat, converting to the latest greatest cult promising safety in the upcoming onslaught, leaving society to free yourself from a the New World Order, and buying the biggest gun to protect yourself from everything from Terrorists, Big Brother, Space Invaders, and the Illuminati. For anybody that has not heard of novelty theory, think of any major event in history. That event carried a make-believe value called novelty that can now be charted on a time line.

Such a graph was made by a philosopher named Terrence McKenna using a Chinese fortune telling system called the I-Ching. It may not be scientifically provable that events carry a “novelty value”, but such a value keeps one from turning all of their fears and fantasies into a predetermined event. So without further delay let’s pick apart the various worldviews that concern themselves with “The Most Novel Event in History”.